Found: The Best Butt-Enhancing Jeans

Sunday, January 20, 2013

Yet another case of "the grass is always greener": the girl with the round, curvy behind is trying to hide it, while the girl with no behind will try anything to beef up her backside. This explains the sudden, scary popularity of butt implants. For those of us not willing to permanently alter our physique, here's the answer.

True Religion Joey jeans do things to a flat backside that verge on unbelievable. A combination of stitching, pocket placement, and pocket decoration work together to give the illusion of a perkier, more rounded behind. I've suggested these jeans to several friends, and every one has walked away happy.

True Religion Super T Joey Jeans

→ Buy the True Religion Super T Joey Jeans, $330.00, at

If you're over the bootcut look, move a few inches to the right on the meticulously maintained True Religion rack to the Billy fit. This straight leg cut boasts the same booty-lifting properties as the Joey, but with without the bootcut leg.

True Religion Super T Billy Jeans

→ Buy the True Religion Super T Billy Jeans, $319.00, at

Skinny jeans have a tendency to accentuate a non-existent behind. But, the Hudson Collin Skinny carries extra insurance against a washed-out backside with classic, wide-set flap pockets.

Hudson Collin Skinny Jeans

→ Buy the Hudson Collin Skinny Jeans, $198.00, at

Miss Me jeans have a slim Juniors cut, which makes their utility limited to a narrow subset of grown women. Beyond that, their ultra-embellished look is best suited to going out, unless you're under 25. That being said, I've seen the miracles they work on a flat butt -- it's freaking amazing.

Miss Me Bootcut Fleur de Lis Jeans

→ Buy the Miss Me Bootcut Fleur de Lis Jeans, $79.99 (was $109.00), at

NYDJ is known for its patented "Lift and Tuck" fit, which aims to both slim the overall look, while lifting a droopy backside. Their Greta trouser is ideal for a woman who has a bit of a behind, but finds that it has migrated a little further south than she'd like, leaving her flat.

NYDJ Greta Trouser Jean

→ Buy the NYDJ Greta Trouser Jean, $110.00, at

Got the flat butt blues? Consider yourself cured.

This post originally appeared on July 19, 2006. It has since been updated.